Episode…

Hello Everyone. This entry is dedicated to the difficult times some of us seem to have. Amen.

For me, they started in college, when I experienced some sort of breakdown and was diagnosed with schizophrenia. This was not a fun time for me at all. I believed people were against me and even out for the worst. Amen. So, not fun. Amen.

I was able to grow from that experience, which I am thankful for after all these years. I mean, it’s tough to have what seem to be intrusive thoughts about everything you look at. It’s tough to be nineteen and go through that. So much negativity, although I look at it differently now because I know that the positivity is there as well. Which one I listen to is up to me, but it does seem to be black and white for a while. Amen.

For me, I was able to grow from the loving experiences I was given. The first of which was a break from school and a long summer to rest and learn to deal with my new life. You see, I didn’t get better overnight, it took a while of continuous reflection and growth. Amen.

I remember one of the most profound experiences I had was a meditation that I practiced for a while in college. I was able to witness my thoughts and let them go until a peaceful state was achieved. It wasn’t the same every time, bu sometimes it really worked and rested my active mind. I was so thankful for that.

I also remember having some really good conversations with a few individuals along the way. These brought me to a place of thoughtful and hopeful reflections form which I grew in contemplation. Amen.

So, I meditated and contemplated.

Ah, when I say the word “contemplation”, it feels and reminds me of what I refer to as “spiritual meat”. I call these deep thoughts that we contemplate “meat” because it takes a while to digest them, maybe even years, but the fruit is long-lasting and can be said to be “on the vine”, so to speak. Amen.

Have you ever had these experiences? I’m sure most of us, if not all, have. Amen.

Anyway, you may be wondering why I’m talking about this stuff. Amen. And, I’m here to let you know. Amen.

You see, within the past few weeks or so, I’ve been dealing with a lot of stress and seeming negativity in my life. My thoughts have been very fearful at times, but not all negative. I was able to conquer each rung of the ladder along the way, until I came to a place where I was enjoying myself again. Can you do that? I’m sure you can. So, what am I really talking about?

I’m talking about how to feel good when things seem to fall apart on the outside or inside. But then again, do they ever really fall apart on the inside? I mean, it seems to me that I have this inner strength that never gives up on how wonderful life can be for me and others. Amen.

So, I guess I’m writing this to share that if you experience a “rough” time, remember that you don’t want it to be rough, and that should be enough to get you through it. Amen. Because, I think, that the voice inside of you that says I want to feel better is your inner-strength leading the way.

I know, trust me, I know, that certain teachings would tell you you might not make it though the hard times. But, I don’t think anyone wants to hear that. Amen.

It’s like when I was diagnosed, I was told the sickness would never go away. And I remember looking at the doctor and thinking “I’m going to get better.” And I did. Amen.

That said, why did I have a tough time these past few weeks if I “got better”. All I can say is I must have believed something out of alignment with truth, and that brought me down for a time. But, I can say, that the truth and positive thinking brought me back to my “A-game”, and out of the trenches I put myself in.

So, I guess I learned once again to not listen to the negativity and remain focused on the positivity that life brings us, or me.

Have a wonderful day and week.

-Travis